When Love Goes the Distance

A Helicopter Tour in Colorado

Distance can put a huge strain on relationships. Jen Im from “Clothes Encounters” on YouTube has a long distance relationship with a guy in England. Michelle Phan has a long distance relationship with her man in mainland Europe. Many military couples endure long separations so that they can serve their country on the home-front and abroad.

Driving down the road today, I realized that God was supplying me and my husband everything we needed to nurture and grow our relationship. Our communication is constrained by time, text or video chats that can be tense. There is also an inability to have physical intimacy with each other.

I know my husband, being a different person than I, does not share exactly the same view and experience of this separation, I still think that my perspective is worth sharing as it shows God’s hand in enriching our relationship. He replaced physical intimacy with physical longing. He gave us opportunities and inspiration to grow on a whole new level of intimacy—the spiritual kind.

Despite the fact that he is not a professing “Christian,” I see God knocking on his heart more and more fervently during this time. God knows that even though my husband longs for my comfort, that His comfort is enough. His kind of comfort can minister to my husband in his time zone when I cannot.

This period of spiritual growth (with God being the conduit that overcomes constraints of time differences) is monumental because it was a major point of weakness (or absent) in our relationship when we were face to face. It makes me realize that even with physical intimacy, there can be a lack of spiritual intimacy. And let’s face it, we all want to reach the mecca of spiritual intimacy. Anyone can knock boots, but can they resonate on a spiritual level?

With this realization, the promise that God honors our marriage has come to life. Our eyes were not on the spiritual side of our marriage in this “season of life.” In fact we were quite locked in on the mundane aspects of keeping the family going while separated. He has infused a supernatural aspect to our relationship.

Despite our physical distance apart, I have never felt so “known” by my husband. Chances are, we would not have reached this point if he were right in front of me. It was the hidden gift in this time apart. It makes me think of the work God wants us to do in our time apart, from hours to months to years.

God substituted something better than what was missing. He supplied spiritual intimacy when we lacked the physical kind. It is akin to losing a cubic zirconia ring and getting a free diamond for a replacement. It feels like a relationship jackpot. He is waiting to make your (future) marriage a testament for his will and love for all people.